Finn and I went on a long hike this morning. We hit up the 9.5km trail and it took us about 2 hrs. My legs can really feel it still. It was the perfect day for it too. No humidity in the air and a breeze. I remembered my bug spray too so I was not fighting horse flies the entire time.
Hiking is not only a good physical workout but a good mental one too. It gives you lots of time to think and reflect about life. I have always for the most part been single in my 27 years here on earth. There has been a little something here or there but for the most part I have been alone. I always had a lot of friends who were also single so it did not seem like such a big deal.
Today I got to thinking that I am going to be 28 years old soon, this has been an eye opening year in terms of friendships and moving on from some. The friends that I do have still, all have a significant other and are starting families, or they live outside of my area so it is hard to see them.
The older I get the lonelier I get. I do not feel the loneliness day to day, but when I really start to think about it, I want someone too.
My shyness has been a big barrier in relationships. I get ultra shy and scared really quickly when starting something new and then I shut down and say goodbye. I do not know how to get over the hump. It usually happens within the first month, when things are going good and then I run.
I am making a 28th year resolution(fuck waiting until the new year). This year I will try hard to meet people and give them a chance. I will fight against all my shyness and anxieties and really try hard to let people in.